storyrainthejournal: (youwhat?)
First of all, thank you again to everyone for good thoughts and wishes re Sula. They mean a lot.

Still feeling pretty gutted about Sula, and so not interested in being at the dayjob (yes, I know--what's different about that, Jessica?). But I'm sure it would have been better for me if I could have stayed home on the couch today with A-cat to write and be sad as needed.

I've developed a stye in my eye.

In other news, making notes and wading slowly into a new novel project, one I'm pretty excited about. Still into Deep Terrain and going to finish a draft any day, really... But it's good to have another project on the table to help me move along more smartly on the current one as well.

In other other news, we (that's the royal we) really need to get more exercise, dammit. Stupid dayjob.

Whiny rant, activate (you may want to avert your eyes): Things this straightjacket, have-to-be-in-this-office-this-many-hours-five-days-a-week effing job makes it hard for me do regularly: write, exercise, see movies. All things fairly essential to my health and sanity, thank you very much. Of course I also like having my nice loft and eating well and taking care of my one remaining cat and my own autoimmune-affected self, so, you know, I can't, like, quit. feh. Why couldn't I have been one of the smart, lucky people who have found ways not to have to have a regular full-time dayjob, like by having mates or being more successful as writers or...sigh.

Finally, I have to say another thank you to my friends and to the universe, for providing me with the actual physical presence of several of those friends over the course of the past weekend. They buoyed me greatly after Sula's death, just by being there, by feeding me, and with hugs.
storyrainthejournal: (sulabear)
Goodbye my Sula kitty. Sulawesi Browncat. Sula-bai, Sula-pie, Sula pironimous rex. Sularouche (Sularouche, Sularouche, can you do the fandango?) Soft brown water. Fierce girl who never let me clip her claws. Sweet girl who loved catnip and her little stuffed olyphaunt. Who gave little brother cat Aristotle what-for, screaming bloody murder before he even touched you. Who loved the sun, like a good solar kitty.

"Your black cat is brown!"

Thanks for being with me, sweetie. I love you.

storyrainthejournal: (sulabear)

Finished my Nebula noms, finally. Had a bunch of reading to catch up with. It's heartening to see 4 noms for my "When the Ice Goes Out." More than I hoped. Thanks, guys!

That one thing I wanted to work on this year, not being sad--or feeling left out of the club in which I was supposed to be--that I'm not one of those writers, even after so long (and though I'm apparently a pretty good writer), who can say "my agent" or "my editor." I don't want to ruin my day that way every other week anymore. I'd like to do this without having to give up reading blogs and tweets.

Well, it's a work in progress. 
I have no horse in the Amazon/Macmillan race particularly, but, yes, I believe that good publishers are important for books to achieve their highest good. I want a book publisher of my own sometime (sigh). Also, I have a goodly few number of loved ones and acquaintances who do have horses in that race. Have removed all Amazon links from my lj and my writing site,

Sula's state of being is a daily consideration now; her appetite, that was so strong for most of this illness, is now getting spotty. My sweet brown cat. I hope she still pulls around and starts to finally respond to the meds, but I'm treasuring every pet, cuddle, and dish of food devoured right now. Send healing love vibes, okay? (I don't care if it's hippy blahooey, send 'em anyway please?)


storyrainthejournal: (carousel horse)
Dreamt that I was traveling with [ profile] planetalyx to a convention and we took a detour to the past to visit a young Michael Swanwick (one of our Clarion teachers) in a closed neighborhood library. Much disarray of books, but it was a charming spot, with overstuffed Victorian divans and armchairs. While there, I lost my voice. It was very frustrating trying to talk and not being able to get above an almost nonexistent whisper--I had a very strong reaction, but then made light of it by planning to write on my badge at the convention, "apparently monkeys have stolen my voice."

My reaction was so strong that when I woke up, I had to talk to make sure I still had my voice.

Symbology, you say? Nah...

I also dreamt briefly that I was preparing an essay on the disitinctions between covert vs. overt learning, and how there is so much more covert learning, and some of it we are so unaware of until it comes to the surface, than overt.

Another follow-up for Sula Pironimous Rex this morning; holding steady--meaning no improvment in her blood count numbers, but no lost ground either. The doc reiterated that recovery time for pure red cell aplasia can be months. She (Sula, not the vet) did come to sit in my lap and rub her scent all over me this morning; I'll take that as a good sign, despite the appearance of every illiminatory option in her carrier between the trip to the vet and the trip home.

storyrainthejournal: (sulabear)
More Sula update: vet says her lab work shows "baby steps" in terms of small progress in red cell count and in the bone marrow output of something or other. She also said this is about par for treatment response to pure red cell aplasia (which is what we think she has)--it can take months of treatment before she'll show significant improvement, apparently. (oy) Also, reason for her lying in her cat litter is that she's anemic--the same way kids will eat sand or dirt when their bodies are craving minerals. She's trying to osmose the iron content in the litter? At least she hasn't started eating it. (oh, please, no...) I wish there was something I could to make her feel better while we're trying to make her better...

Me: stayed home yesterday to sleep a lot, cause I could feel a cold trying to settle in. Much sleep and a few cold-eze lozenges seem to have kept it at bay. Back at dayjobbage today.

I have an odd little photography project in mind that I'll probably get started on today or tomorrow.

Sula update

Dec. 7th, 2009 11:33 am
storyrainthejournal: (sulabear)
Latest behaviorial weirdness: lying in her cat litter all night. Vet says cats do this when they're anemic. Kind of how kids eat sand or dirt when they need iron or other minerals.

Despite the metric ton of water she's been drinking, and pee she's then producing (seriously, so. much. pee.), she hasn't been made diabetic by the steroids she's on. Also doesn't appear to be in kidney failure. (um, yay) More results tomorrow when lab work is done.

That's the Sula report.

Is it really only Monday morning still?
storyrainthejournal: (polarbearlove)
Six days off in a row: finally relaxed and centered again. Here's to staying that way for a while. Highlights: Thanksgiving dinner at Maureen McHugh's; writing; reading; napping; much cat cuddling; seeing The Fantastic Mr. Fox; rainy afternoon seafood under big old trees at Perla's w/neighbor B.

Didn't finish Deep Terrain draft over November, but enough progress that I can see finishing the draft by the end of the year.

Sula, no new updates. She's still living in the bathroom undersink cabinet; otherwise all her behaviors are normal and she continues to get pilled morning and evening. Another follow-up next week.

I'm thinking it's going to be cards and tokens for presents this year, except for the various kids in my life. The credit card bill is sky high for Sula and I have big copays for recent stuff of my own coming up. So, yeah. (But I'm not sorry I put that Perla's meal on my credit card--totally worth the mood-lifting it returned.)

Recent viewing: this 1998 version of Dickens' Our Mutual Friend. Very much enjoyed it. Still making my way through Wire in the Blood, but I've hit the seasons w/out Hermione Norris and I miss her. Also still viewing and enjoying Moribito: Guardian of the Spirit, up to the newest volume out. It's a low-key, rather lovely and evocative anime. I have the first volume in book form, too.

Reading The Ghost Writer by John Harood currently and thoroughly enjoying it--best novel of its kind I've read in a long time--way better than much-touted The Little Stranger, which disappointed me.

I may use this icon a lot in the next while; things are really not looking good for polar bears.
storyrainthejournal: (what?)

So, anent my little list of Nebula-eligible fictions, "Nights at the Crimea" in the Passing for Human anthology is not in fact eligible, since PS Publishing is not a U.S. publisher. I think the other really strong story of mine published during the eligible period is "When the Ice Goes Out," in the Otherworldly Maine anthology. I will be happy to send any voting SFWA member who's interested a copy of the story for reading and possible recc'ing.
Sula-cat had a follow-up this morning and her bloodwork is showing improvement with a higher red blood cell count. Yay, and fingers crossed her improvement continues.
Courtesy of Sula-cat, I am very much broke, but you should check out the Interfictions art auction, because there's some really lovely stuff there and Interfictions and the Interstitial Arts Foundation rock.
Likewise, Polyphony and Wheatland Press are quite the awesome. If you want Polyphony to continue--which doesn't just mean a great collection of stories for reading, but the continuation of a well-respected market for same--get thee to this page and pre-order Polyphony 7 so it actually comes into existence.
Lastly for this post, Apparitions, a lovely literary collection of ghostly tales, including my "Incantation," is now available on Amazon (title is linked); tasty little solstice gift: Experience the watery secrets of Venice's black canals. Investigate the forests and hillocks of the untamed English countryside. Visit a Bulgarian resort that holds a dark secret. 13 tales of apparitions, phantoms, ghosts, and wraiths, from modern masters of the macabre.

storyrainthejournal: (bluebutterfly)

Via [info]mevennen, hee (and awesome!):

Sula has a bright green bandage wrapped around one leg and we're waiting for the results of her very expensive, so painful she had to be put under, test. Hoping for fungal infection in her bones. Cause that's the best option.

It's a good thing I'm not officially doing NaNoWriMo because I don't like writing under pressure; when my back brain says, I need to take a little while to mull this over, it is, for me, generally best to listen to it. Otherwise I end up having to backtrack and do things over to get back on the right path. And I'd rather enjoy writing than just get it done.

I'm still aiming to finish a draft of Deep Terrain this month, but between dayjobbery and Sula stuff, it might only get part way there. And that's fine, because the push will have moved things along. The novel will get done.

I liked the tag quote from last night's Criminal Minds a lot (I may get this slightly off a word or two, but this is the gist): It is better to write for yourself and have no public, than to write for the public and have no self.

Of course, ideally, one likes to be writing for oneself and engaging, entertaining, and rewarding some portion of the reading public as well. 


storyrainthejournal: (mehat)

A few things...

A.M. Dellamonica's ([ profile] planetalyx) upcoming UCLA online writing courses are currently open for registration. See her post here. She puts a lot into these courses.
Briefly, on Sula: more money, didn't respond to med, no clear answers, seeing the internist next (yet more money--I am sooo broke); however, she's no worse, so yay.
Busybusybusy at dayjob, which is putting a crimp in the progress of my plan to finish the novel this month, but I'm still going to finish a draft, dammit.
Received the beautiful Apparitions anthology in the mail from Canada yesterday. Picture later, but it looks like a really great read--all new ghost stories!! Including my short, modest contribution, "Incantation." (I think you can just shoot Mike an email to order your very own copy.)
storyrainthejournal: (eek)
Best Halloween moment was Friday night; N & I went for dinner at the Chinatown downtown. When the guy dressed as a Tong member walked in, I actually thought, at first, huh, so Chinese gang business goes on here? I mean, he had the hat, the sharp shirt and pants, the big gold ring, but mostly he was just wearing the attitude so well that really was my first thought--until he was joined for dinner by a guy with his white button down shirt ripped and half hanging out and blood-soaked. 

Dio de los Muertos today; I really prefer Day of the Dead to Halloween--at least, I prefer the trappings of it to the commercial ones of Halloween, and the fact that the meaning is still fairly clear and true and undiluted by said commercialism. Or maybe it's just that I don't really like pumpkins.

If I'd known about it sooner, I might be going to But I will be hanging with some peeps for the afternoon, and that's really the best.

Bonus writing update: I'm not officially participating in Nanowrimo, but I am determined to finish a draft of Deep Terrain this month, another 40-50k to bring it just over 100k. To that end, had a good writing session this morning, which makes me way happy. Wish me luck in keeping it up.

Bonus Sula update: I built her a fort under the windowsill, for when it's too hot on the windowsill and she seems to like it, but when I had the door open earlier to water the plants, she shot out into the breezeway and didn't want to come back into the loft. That's a first. She's scared of the loft. The vet is kind of stumped, she's (Sula, not the vet) not responding to the meds, but she's not getting any worse, still eating and drinking water and (mostly) managing to use the litter box (which is now in her fort).


Oct. 21st, 2009 04:01 pm
storyrainthejournal: (sulabear)

just another kitty update... )In other news, there will be a happy book-related post tonight, dammit.
storyrainthejournal: (Default)
Thanks for the good thoughts on Sula, guys. Will update as situation develops.

Some pics from Inner Space, click on one to go up to the gallery for some more. Hard, of course, to give a real idea when you don't have a special camera for the light situation.


storyrainthejournal: (Default)

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